Vampires Of Venice
(Series 5, Dr 11 with Amy and Rory, 8/5/2010, showrunner: Steven Moffat, writer: Toby Whithouse, director: Jonny Campbell)
Rank: 258
''So sweetie, what star sign are you? Oh, aquarium OK... fancy a stroll down the beach? Oh, in the sea I'm alright with that...You know, your teeth are like stars. They're coming out at night. Wait...That's not right....Aaaaagh!'
Gulp! I don't know what they put in the water on this episode but there's something...fishy about just how hormonal all the characters seem to be in what's not only the most Twilight but also the most Mills and Boon of Dr Who stories (only, this being DW, the one having the hots inappropriately in a love triangle is the companion whose just had her imaginary friend come to life, the sexy girls are vampire alien fish and instead of bodice rippers they're out to, well, rip other things). Everyone is at it in this story: There's the female vampire fish from outer space trying to find human males to mate with. The chief vampire fish having the hots for the Doctor. Amy and Rory getting it together during their first trip in the Tardis, though Amy still not-so-secretly has the hots for the Doctor. For a while it looks as if the Doctor has the hots for the alien fish too. It's a fun but frivolous story this one. It doesn't have a lot to say, the plot goes as far as any plot with vampire alien fish can go and its riding the bandwagon for sexy vampires so obviously I think it got a speeding ticket, but its one of those stories that has fun doing it. Nowadays, much more so than on broadcast, its a product of its time in the same way that every mid-1960s base from the future had psychedelic light displays and the 1970s always seemed to be bright orange, with a lot of '50 Shades of Gray' in there as well as Twilight (what with creating 'Being Human' too its beginning to look as if author Toby Whithouse might have a bit of a vampire fetish, though it was Steven Moffat's request to make it 'romantic'). It seems odd in retrospect how 'normal' putting this stuff in a programme made for family viewing was, though its also refreshing to have an alien race who want to conquer humanity not for money or power or resources but sex. Though I can't help wonder why the sisters of the water don't just elope with whales or dolphins, given that they probably have more in common with them genetically than Humans (surely much more to their taste than hairy land-walking apes). There are some tasty lines, Rory gets a very funny swordfight in one of his first major scenes that nicely sets up his character (and is not unlike how his dad gets introduced a couple of series later) and the setting (filming actually took place in Croatia not Venice) is gorgeous. It's just that this quite a silly episode that doesn't have much, you know, bite. Which is ironic when you think about it.
Positives + Matt Smith is often the best thing in the stories that make up his three series as the Doctor and rarely more so than here. He somehow manages to be totally convincing as the object of so many people's affections, yet genuinely alieny oblivious to it all not to mention hilariously funny (again while being oblivious to it), endlessly enthusiastic and, when the occasion demands it, violently outraged. You so buy into the Doctor's feelings in this story that you almost forget he's ticking off a bunch of alien fish people. Almost. I also have to mention the fan-friendly moment when he gets out his library card and it still has a picture of William Hartnell's Doctor on it 'because I keep forgetting to update it!'
Negatives - The publicity overdrive for this one suggested it would be DW's most 'romantic' story. At last, how sweet I thought to myself as there's a lot of scope in this series for making saving the universe be about saving two people for an occasional story. But, erm, nope. What we got wasn't love or romance at all, it was lusty busty fish people from outer space, which is quite a different vibe altogether!
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